You might not live in the greatest country in the world if…

  • Everyone doesn’t have equal rights, and the majority of the population doesn’t want everyone to have equal rights.
  • You”ll be punished for not buying health insurance that doesn’t cover basic health care costs
  • It’s illegal to protest against corruption
  • There are more empty, foreclosed homes than there are homeless people
  • You have to go into a lifetime of debt in order to get a college education
  • Your country has more prisoners than any other country in the world
  • Your military tortures prisoners
  • It’s illegal for tax payers to know what their military is spending their money on
  • It’s legal to sell certain poisons, but it’s illegal to sell certain medicines
  • The majority of the population believes in mythology
  • Your police force is militarized
  • Your police force drives $50,000+ cars to chase you down to give you expensive tickets for not wearing a seat belt
  • Your government spies on you and downplays and lies about it
  • It’s illegal to report corruption in the government
  • Your government can’t give a reasonable, coherent answer why its military invades other countries
  • The soldiers in your military are denied the same basic human rights guaranteed in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights
  • It’s illegal for certain workers to unionize
  • You can be issued a warrant to be arrested for not mowing your lawn
  • You have to ask for permission to have a garage sale
  • You don’t have any direct say in what taxes you have to pay, and you can go to jail for not paying your taxes
  • Your country gives massive financial and military aid to countries that commit genocide
  • Your country is famous for mass shooting sprees
  • Most of the food products sold at grocery stores contain poison
  • It’s legal mutilate baby boys’ penises and commonly practiced
  • It’s illegal for women to take off their shirt
  • You have to waive certain basic human rights to get a job
  • It’s illegal to sell fireworks on any day except New Years and Independence Day
  • Police can search your vehicle and analyze your bodily fluids without probable cause
  • Only rich people can run for president
  • Janitors and soldiers are required to take drug tests, but the leaders of the country aren’t
  • Your taxes are so complicated that you have to pay someone else to figure them out for you, and you can go to jail for not filing your taxes
  • You will go to jail for years for stealing a pair of shoes, but you’ll get a slap on the wrist for destroying the eco system
  • Most of the products sold in your stores are made by slaves in sweat shops
  • Life in your country is stressful enough to inspire musicians to rail against it… for decades
  • The minimum wage is below the living wage, and the majority of the population will fight tooth and nail to keep it that way
  • It’s illegal to pay for consensual sex
  • Television stations celebrate the lives of woefully ignorant people while ignoring the most massive problems facing humanity… because the general population cares more about the lives of ignorant people than the most massive problems facing humanity
  • Religious groups that believe in mythology don’t have to pay taxes, but expats who have left the country and will never return do
  • Cussing is illegal, and millions of dollars are spent every year regulating it
  • You practically have to have a degree in business and mathematics to manage all the bureaucracy required to sell oranges on the side of road
  • International corporations are legally defined as people and have more rights than people born outside of your national boundaries
  • Politicians are exempt from laws that tax payers aren’t
  • Politicians aren’t automatically fired when their approval rating drops below 10%
  • Your country is famous for how inhumane its prison system is

5 responses to “You might not live in the greatest country in the world if…

  • 1 L Loyd

    We may not be the greatest, but how do we compare? I don’t know what other countries are like in many of these areas.


    • wise sloth

      Other first world countries are much better than America in terms of health care, access to education and prison populations. In other areas they’re slightly better. Overall there are dozens of countries that have a higher standard of living. Many third world countries have more freedoms than America even if their governments are more obviously corrupt. However, none of those countries fanatically, dogmatically and incorrectly claim to be the best country in the world like America does.


  • John

    Although I agree with most of the points there are a few you’ll have to explain.
    I believe our justice system is way out of whack but I’ve always thought our prisons are way lenient compared to some other countries. For example the prisoners have the best health care of any group of people in the country.


    • The Overseer

      True, but it doesn’t change the fact that we have the most people in prison per capita, in the world, and they are still treated inhumanely. Have you ever been given Solitary confinement? I have. It is inhumane and reprehensible. It is not good for mental stability at all. I only had to deal with it for 3 months and I thought I was going to die. That’s just one of many ways that our treatment of “criminals” is unethical.

      Never mind the fact that millions of people are in prison for victimless crimes, or petty crimes. Our justice system (and really our whole modernity) needs to be restructured.


  • Donit

    This is a post that is so awesome it needs no replies.


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